Dance is the hidden language of the soul. The body says what words cannot.

New York New York

2008-12-17T06:21:00.002+08:00

It's my 3rd day in New York... It snowed today and is really very cold! hehe... first time seeing snow, really quite fun!!!

Everything is quite overwhelming man... the place, ppl, the dance... Im really trying to adapt to it... But im enjoying wat i had learned here...

Finally got things settled, accomodation at midtown... it's a really good location cos it's near all the dance studios i wanna go... the only thing is it's really v v v small and not cheap... guess im paying for the location lor... at least i dun have to squeeze in the subway everyday... hehe...

Got a US line up too... so that I can contact ppl here easily... u can all call me at 646-416-0501... hehe... free incoming for me, not too sure for u... hahaa..

Did two ballet classes and 1 jazz class today... just wanna say that the environment here at Broadway Dance Centre is amazing! You can constantly surrounded by dancers, and there are classes everyday for you to observe...

The teachers are really nice, patient and friendly, my ballet teacher today paid attention to me cos he knows im kinda not too trained in ballet... hehe... he's really very nice... learned so much from him...

Starting from beginner classes now... wanna get myself conditioned first then start attacking all the other classes... it's really cool here...

Miss everybody back in Singapore... Hope everybody is doing well... :)

I hate money

2008-09-13T22:29:00.002+08:00

I hate money.

You must be thinking I must be crazy. How can anyone hate money when it can give u wat u want?

Im just wishing that life can be alot more simpler without money. I hate it that the whole world evolves around money.

You have worries whether you have money or not.

When you are rich, you worry people will cheat you or befriend you because of your money. When you are poor, without a doubt, you worry about survival and wish that you have more money to buy what you want.

There's so many people who work very very hard for money. For families, for themselves. They work so hard that they neglect the important things and people in their lives.

For example, families. They work so hard to provide for their families, sometimes in the end when they are gone, the families cared about the money they left behind more than missing them.

Well, Im being very pessimistic here. Im quite a pessimistic person.

Let's just say I cared abt other things more than money. But most people around me don't think the same way.

Even the ones closest to me.

Well, you can say, when u have enough money, u can do watever you want and you can care less about money.

But will money ever be enough? Will you stop earning just cos u got 1 million? I doubt so. You will say since I got 1 million why not I make it 2 million?

And the circle will never never ends.

When you finally think that you earned enough, you are probably 65 years old getting your CPF, and too troubled with many many health issues to do wat you wanted when you were 25.

Ultimately, you cannot bring money into your grave.

I wish to live a life not controlled by money. I want my life to be more than that.

Shanghai Blues Family

2008-02-13T22:10:00.005+08:00

Though Shanghai Blues is now officially over... but I still miss all the people involved...

I had so much fun with these lovely people... so many sweet memories and valuable experiences that I won't ever forget...

Thank You Everybody of Shanghai Blues for this wonderful experience... I don't regret spending CNY with all of you!!!

for more pictures... check out my facebook... hehe...

First day of Shanghai Blues Rehearsal

2008-01-07T21:09:00.000+08:00

Today I finally started doing work after bumming around for 3 weeks... haha...

It's an exciting day with the rehearsal of Shanghai Blues...

Spent a long time working on the opening dance with Jeffrey Tan...

He's very detailed, serious and firm... He makes me wanna work very hard to reach his standard...

Acting out the 2nd scene today is fun... hehe... never really have much formal training on acting but i guess im still ok lah... hehe...

By the time 6pm come by, I was really very tired liao... hehe...

But it's a really fruitful day... learnt alot...

Beauty World Cha cha cha

2008-01-05T23:53:00.000+08:00

I just watched Beauty World's gala show just now... I must say it's really impressive...

The story is beautiful... Set, props, costumes are fabulous...

Artistes on stage are really strong... even those doing it for the first time....

What a nice way to motivate myself before I start Shanghai Blues rehearsals...

Got a lot of work to do... I want people to say the same thing or better about Shanghai Blues like what I wrote above...

Learnt alot of things from Beauty World....

I never went home with just a ticket stub and a program booklet... hehe...

Thank you Wild Rice!!! Great Job!!!!

9am

2007-12-24T09:04:00.001+08:00

24 dec 2007, 9am...

Woke up at 8.06am by a sms... slept for 3 hrs...

N learn that im bad-tempered n grumpy about everything in life.

n that without tolerance, no relationship can last...

I have been thinking, is it good to tolerate? If u have to tolerate the one u loved, is there something wrong?

Or should e word be "trying to understand each other, n accepting their flaws"...

Just plainly tolerate with no understanding, will only make things worse...

I hate to quarrel... someone will disagree w me about that...

But my "calmly discussions" will always lead to quarrels cos:

1) It is mostly done in the most ineffective way - sms
2) the person has already formed negative views abt u even before u start
3)"discussions" = "complaints"
4) the person strongly believe that u r in for a fight

N one lesson learnt everybody, is never to ignore people even when u r angry.
Cos u really do not know how it will affects the other person.
Mind became completely confused, u will keep thinking wat's happening... N ya... the waiting is the worst thing ever.

Imagine this scenario, you are enjoying urself somewhere, shopping or wat...etc. But you knew there's somebody at home, sillyly just waiting for ur sms or call...

Plus the tears never stop... you can't control it...

4am

2007-12-24T03:51:00.001+08:00

24 dec 2007 4am

Im really trying very hard to sleep... but I can't...

Once I close my eyes, tears start flowing n my heart starts beating very fast...

Sending pain to all over my body...

3am

2007-12-24T02:59:00.000+08:00

24 dec 2007, 3am...

Still can't get to sleep... Thank you Jacko for chatting with me...

tears have run dry... feeling a deep sense of despair...

Love... Didn't know it hurts so much...

2am

2007-12-24T02:21:00.000+08:00

It's 24 dec 2007, 2am

I can't sleep. My tears kept flowing. I can't control it.

I can't believe anyone can be this cruel to the one he once loved.

My heart aches... It's really painful.

It's over...

2007-12-23T17:18:00.000+08:00

It's all over...

I did all I can...

I thought he is the one... but I guess Im wrong...

Thank You my Lord, Jesus Christ... Thank you for answering my prayer... I love You...

Goodbye people...

Im flying away to New York next year...

Apologize

2007-12-22T23:45:00.000+08:00

Just wanna share this song in timbaland's shock value album... I think most of you have heard of this song before... very nice... making me even sadder now...

"Apologize"

I'm holding on your rope

Got me ten feet off the ground

And I'm hearing what you say

But I just can't make a sound

You tell me that you need me

Then you go and cut me down

But wait...

You tell me that you're sorry

Didn't think I'd turn around and say..

That it's too late to apologize, it's too late

I said it's too late to apologize, it's too late

I'd take another chance, take a fall, take a shot for you

And I need you like a heart needs a beat

(But that's nothing new)

Yeah yeah

I loved you with a fire red, now it's turning blue

And you saySorry like the Angel Heaven let me think was you,

But I'm afraid

It's too late to apologize, it's too late

I said it's too late to apologize, it's too late

Woahooo woah

It's too late to apologize, it's too late

I said it's too late to apologize, it's too late

I said it's too late to apologize, yeah

I'm holding on your rope

Got me ten feet off the ground...

No life

2007-11-10T23:41:00.000+08:00

I feel that I have no life.

To make matters worse, I'm not important to anyone in this world. Not even my parents, who will only ask me for money and push me aside when they dun need me.

I want to run away. Run away from everybody in my life.

I just want to be alone.

Phobia

2007-11-10T16:50:00.000+08:00

I realised Im developing a phobia for crowded places.

I cannot stand crowded trains, buses, shopping centres... etc. Especially in crowded trains where people pushed and pushed and pushed, speak very loudly, children crying...etc.

Then there's those people in the shopping centre who will stare at you rudely when they are the ones who bump into you. Or responded rudely when you ask them not to cut your queue.

My heart will start to beat faster and faster, body will get hotter and hotter, you will feel like screaming out loud inside of you...

Oh my, this is really bad for health... Better avoid these places. Go when it's absolutely neccessary.

Nothing is impossible if you are willing to do the work.

2007-10-31T21:46:00.000+08:00

It's been a while since I blogged. Well, as usual, I have been busy with work at MDC.

Recently I began to feel really quite shitty about my dancing. I have injuries at my lower back and left tendon. No matter how hard I tried to take care of them, the pain just don't go away. I have problems stretching and dancing. Things I could do relatively well last time, now became a challenge to me.

Then I started thinking that Im too lazy and untalented as a dancer. Making me very not motivated to go to work. I keep on being pessimistic and tell myself that I sucks.

To the extent that I want to quit dancing and do something else.

Im on mc for 2 days and while lying down on my bed doing nothing, I picked up my "DANCE" magazine and read.

This line popped out of the magazine and stick to my head - "Nothing is impossible if you are willing to do the work."

I realised that I have just been giving myself excuses.

So what if I got injuries? So what if im not gifted as a dancer? So what if Im not as good as others?

I have to look beyond my handicaps and start looking at what I can do.

Am i still willing to dance? Without any doubt, it's a big "YES"!

Time to stop giving myself excuses and do something.

Common Sense?

2007-07-15T22:26:00.000+08:00

I witnessed a super riduculous incident yesterday!

I was standing by the side of the train door at City Hall Mrt waiting for the train to arrive...

As the train was stopping, a man suddenly walked right in front of the train door waiting anxiously to get on the train...

The train door opened, a group of people was trying to get off the train... but they were blocked by this idiotic man who keeps trying to squeeze himself into the train!

Finally, a big sized guy pushed this man aside, and the rest finally able to get out of the train...

Worst thing is this man kept his gaze on this big sized guy as if he wanna confront him and fight with him...

All this while blocking the rest of us trying to get into the train...

What have the world become? Such a ridiculously rude and no common sense person actually exist...

My new sneakers!

2007-06-15T22:06:00.000+08:00

To celebrate me getting distinctions for my music theory grade 5... hehe... me bought myself a pair of new dance sneakers!

It's not too ex... 75 bucks... and it's pink! He he... Costume Connections only bring in one pair of size 35 and im lucky to be able to buy it! hehe..

So happy now... haha... i realise I quite a dance fanatic...I can spend lots of money buying dance sneakers, ballet shoes, leotards,dance pants... etc. And i cant even bear to buy myself a nice long skirt at 19 bucks... haha...Kinda strange considering many girls will spend their money buying nice clothes for themselves...

Anyway... here's a pic of my new dance sneakers, the one in pink! Can't wait to try it out in the studio on monday.... hehe...

Happy Birthday To Me!

2007-04-24T20:34:00.000+08:00

Wah... two more days and Im 24 yrs old! Time really passes very fast!!!

Feels so old liao... haha... but very glad that I made the decision of pursuing a performing arts career...

At least when Im a grandma, I can tell my grandchildren that their granny used to be a dancer! Haha...

Well, pretty satisfied with my life now... really pray hard that nothing really bad and dramatic come along...

But then life got it's ups and downs, just have to learn to get over it and handle it as best as you could!

One thing I learn that will never go wrong is to be positive... Being angry or take things too hard will lead you to be more unhappy with your life...

And always be satisfied with what you have and treasure the people around you...

Don't take those people who cares for you for granted...

Well, enough of all this "Da Dao Li"...

Happy Birthday to Me! :)

Piggy Joke

2007-03-31T18:30:00.000+08:00

The cut on our piglet wasn't very serious, but it did require stitches.

So I sent my teenage daughter back into the farmhouse to get a needle and thread, while I looked after the squealing animal.

Ten minutes later, she still hadn't returned.

"What are you doing?" I called out.

She yelled back. "Looking for the pink thread!"

Still can't sleep

2007-02-28T00:28:00.000+08:00

It's 12.30am now... earlier than yesterday but I still can't get to sleep... Although I worked from 9am to 10pm today...

I have to wake up at 7am tml... But no matter how hard I tried I still can't get to sleep...

My eye still hurts... It hurts more than yesterday... Wanted to go see a doctor but I don't even have the time to do that... I better go tml after show...

Haiz... 4 more shows to go this week... But Im glad that Aidil announced that there's a change of artistes for this sunday's show... which means I don't have to stand on the chingay float and wave my hand for 3 freaking hours... Great...

I feel like my whole life now is going on a downslope... Everything is so bad for me now... Im not feeling well cos of my eye... then I can't eat properly cos I didn't sleep enough... I just feel physically and mentally drained and tired...

And Kiki is still upset with me... I feel like Im losing him...

Haiz... Cried a little but it hurts like hell... I can't even cry when Im upset...

I need a break. And someone who cares and willing to listen to all my shit... But then I shouldn't depend on people all the time...

Guess I have to get through this dark period of time myself...

My sky is full of dark clouds again...

Sucky month of Feb...

2007-02-27T02:08:00.000+08:00

It's been more than a month since I last blogged...

Cos really very very busy with company stuffs... and it's not finished yet...

It's 2am now and I felt really tired yet I can't get to sleep... If I can, I won't be blogging here...

It's been a really bad Feb for me...

It started off with a really bad quarrel with Kiki over work stuff... Then burned off all my weekends cos of the Chingay... Plus the usual Music Theory stuffs and road shows... and a sad valentine day... and stupid chinese new yr spring cleaning...

Last Friday, Saturday and Sunday were all spent doing Chingay...

Tml there's a show at the zoo...

Wed there's a show at an old folk home, plus ballet class in the evening...

Thurs there's music theory class in the morning, show at pasir ris camp in the afternoon and evening...

Friday there's music theory class in the morning, show at mandai camp in the afternoon and evening...

Saturday and Sunday... Chingay Chingay Chingay Chingay Chingay!!!! Arghh....

And then next Saturday is the Music theory exam, next Sunday is my company's D & D in which me and choon hui are deputy chairman...

Arghhh... Im seriously overworked... Physically mentally stressed....

Even watching Dream Girls just now didn't really make me feel better... Though I was seated in Gold Class...

Now I can't even cry cos my eye will hurts if I cry... Im having this internal bleeding in my eye... ganna hit on the eye during Chingay parade... Now it's all red and swollen...

I tried my very best not to indulge in self pity and try to be strong...

It's very hard not to fall down the cliff... How I wish I can just let go of my hands and fall...

But I can't... Cos the world is not about me alone...

End of Block Leave!

2007-01-07T17:09:00.000+08:00

Waaaahhhh.... so sad... today is the last day of my holiday... It's back to work tomorrow... Sianz...
Why is it that I felt that I still don't have enough rest leh? Haha...

Anyway, this year will be a busy year for me... Work wise there's Chingay and NDP plus many many army roadshows...

Personal developments are Ballet Class at SDT, Music Theory Grade 5, Piano lessons and dance classes at Studio Wu.

And I must overcome my phobia of driving by this year! Must start driving soon... Haven't been driving for 1 year liao... hehe...

Also, working on some illusion stuffs with Kiki... Quite fun... Busy busy year man... Hehe...

Yeppoon Beach

2006-12-05T21:05:00.000+08:00

Today I went to another beach!!! Hehe... It's near the Yeppoon Town Hall that we were performing... It's called Yeppoon Main Beach...

Though not as natural as the beach at emu park but it's still quite beautiful... here are some pictures... hehe...

Beach at Emu Park

2006-12-04T21:55:00.000+08:00

I went to a really fantastic beach today! It's at Emu Park and it's one of the most beautiful beach I ever seen...

I love it cos it's so natural... not affected by tourism, industrial stuffs... etc... It's just so beautiful and natural...

Here are some pictures... the pictures doesn't turn out as nice as the actual thing... It's much more beautiful in real life...

Im sure you will like it too... :)

Interesting Stuffs

2006-12-04T08:49:00.000+08:00

Just wanna share some interesting stuffs I saw in Rockhampton...

Every morning when we woke up for breakfast... we will be able to see wild kangaroos eating the grass just right in front of our dining hall...

Here are some pictures!

And there was one night when an animal appears outside our balcony! Giving quite a number of us a scare! Hehe...

According to Zaini, it's called a possum... Here are the pics!

Aussie Food!!!

2006-11-29T16:27:00.000+08:00

Now... here are the photos of food we eat here at the CQU's dining hall... Their food are really very nice... 100 times better than our packed lunch... which is so eeeeeeeeeeeee..... hehe...

Too bad we can't get to eat every meal here everyday... at least we can have breakfast there everyday... hehe...

BREAKFAST!

LUNCH!

DINNER!

My Room!

2006-11-29T15:14:00.000+08:00

Here's some pictures of my hostel room in Rockhampton!

We are staying at the Central Queensland University, Jardine House 2nd floor... Hehe... Quite nice and comfortable!

Rockhampton!

2006-11-23T07:54:00.000+08:00

Finally I got to Rockhampton... In the Central Queensland University's hostel now typing this post...

It's 9.50am now in Australia... Only 7.50am in Singapore! No wonder I felt sleepy now... Hehe...

Before that, here are some pictures I took at Changi Airport yesterday... hmmm... at 5am...

Lyn, Me and Shima... N Kiki 2!

Me and my dear dear plus our lovely piggy, Kiki 2! Hehe...

Willy Tay didn't go to Rockhampton with us, but this young, small boy is so nice to come and send us off... Hehe... :)

By the way, the food here are really nice... hehe... will post more pictures when I have them... hehe...

What happened to me?

2006-10-11T23:56:00.000+08:00

What happened to me? Where is the Fion who used to be smiling always, loves to chat with friends, positive and energetic?

She used to be really friendly, loves to joke around and make people laugh... She likes to maintain a cheerful nature so that everyone around her will feel comfortable and relaxed...

But now, she is gloomy, tired, lack of energy, disappointed, can't trust people, get insecure very easily, don't really like to talk much, cries more that she laughs... You hardly sees her smile much...

Don't be mistaken, It's not that my boyfriend bully me or wat, he's a great guy who cares alot about me and dote on me alot... it's just me who had suddenly just got so negative about life...

Reasons? Environment at work? Family problem? Confidence issue? My past sucky relationship?

I don't know... Still trying to find out.

But no matter what, I want the old Fion back.

Limited me

2006-10-08T22:52:00.000+08:00

Feel like shit... Im so limited... so little things I can do... willing to do... Felt so sorry for people around me... Haiz...y m I like that

Taking our position for granted

2006-09-14T23:14:00.000+08:00

Yesterday I was really sick - flu, menses and back pain... felt really shitty... But as I got show at a camp so couldn't take mc... Anyway, I performed terribly... One of my worst shows...

The worst part is I left the stage not feeling very bad abt it, instead what's in my mind was to hurry pack up and go home.

I pondered about this after I went back home and realised that as a full time performer, whether conscious or not, we tend to take the stage for granted.

I remembered the moment before the first time I went on stage to dance. Sweaty palms, cold sweat breaking out at your forehead, heartbeats pounding faster and faster, legs felt wobbly... etc. If you are a performer, you will know what I mean.
At that moment, I felt it was such a privilege to be able to be on stage, I wanted to go on stage and do my best and show to the audience how much I love dancing, how much dancing means to me....

And the satisfaction and happiness I got from the audience's applause was really memorable...

So now, when performing on stage becomes a norm, something that I always do... I tend to forgot the joy of wanting to perform for the audience and how it is such a privilege for me to be able to perform full time...

You might have done a particular dance item for the nth time... you dun even have to think abt the steps, it just come to u naturally... but let's not do it for the sake of doing...

This is your nth time, but for the audience, this might be their first time watching you dance and the only time u might have to leave an impression.

Stupid Ghost Story!

2006-09-03T00:42:00.000+08:00

I really hate ghost story!!!! cos they make me scared for nothing... it's even worse when u r already feeling so tired, worried abt show tml and the day after, and then ur bf suddenly shouted to scare you!

Haiz...

Happy National Day!

2006-08-09T11:32:00.001+08:00

Happy National Day people! Not so happy for me cos I have to work today... but it's ok cos it's a off day for me tomorrow and I can go wakeboarding with my dear dear! Oh ya! For those who don't know yet... Im happily attached to a wonderful guy... Mr Kiki Tay!

Ya... He is the same guy I mentioned in my previous post... hehe... :P Here's his picture!

My dear dear dote on me so much...everyday i feel very fortunate that I have him with me now...
Hehe... Im the happiest girl in the world now... :)

Tong Hua

2006-07-16T16:10:00.000+08:00

I went to Clementi Kbox last night with a friend... He sang Guang Liang's Tong Hua.
I broke down and cried. Felt so sorry towards this friend... :p

Why I cried?

If you wanna woo a girl, I felt this is the best song you can sing. Cos the lyrics and melody of this song is so beautiful, so touching.

This song reminds me of my sad past. When I first heard of this song, in my mind I was thinking "How I wish one day a guy I love will sing it for me."

Slightly more than a year ago, a few days before I went for my Japan Trip, I was going through the darkest period of my life. I was so depressed that I thought I was almost going crazy. My mind was like going through a maze, heading here and there but can't get out.

Then came the day when I boarded the SIA plane to Japan. In the song list of the in-flight entertainment system, I saw this song, Tong Hua. I listened to it over and over again. Throughout the whole 7-hours flight, I just keep listening to this song over and over and over and over again... I lost count of how many times I have listened to the song.

As I was listening to the song, I tell myself to be strong. I tell myself one day, there will be a guy who loves you and he will sing this song for you. That one day your life will be like a fairy tale, happily ever after.

At that time I guess I was coaxing myself to be happy. Pretending that the guy sitting beside me at that time still loves me. Pretending that the whole trip will be wonderful and I will enjoy myself.

I did the same thing on the way back from Japan to Singapore, listening to this song over and over again. Pretending that when I reached Singapore, everything will be like before. Nothing have changed. Pretending that he will not leave me for another girl.

I lied to myself all the way. A futile attempt to make myself feel better. Pathetic ya?

So I cried last night. Felt really silly now. Haha...

Tohoshinki!

2006-06-18T15:07:00.000+08:00

I bought a new album, Heart, Mind and Soul by Tohoshinki! And I totally fall in love with this group! Esp the guy in the middle! Hero! Wat a nice name! Hahaa....

Here's a closer look - - -

My Hero! Haha!

Admitting and Repenting

2006-04-10T23:28:00.000+08:00

Here's a story that makes alot of sense...

A pastor I know had a secret, sinful lifestyle. But it finally caught up with him. People in the church began to talk, and he had to do something to address the situation. So one Sunday he stood before his congregation and tearfully acknowledged his sin and asked for their forgiveness.

They forgave him, and incredibly they even kept him as their pastor. But privately he never let go of the sin!

Admitting that you did something wrong is not the same as repenting over the wrong you did. Words of remorse, tears, admitting you're sorry, and acknowledging "Yes, I did it" are not the same real biblical repentance, We should feel sorry about our sins, We should be remorseful. But we must also have the deep desire not to do it again.

Repentance means a life-change. Sorrow and remorse are a part of that, but the ultimate fruit of repentance is not saying, "You know I cried over that, you know I said I was wrong and yes, I acknowledge I did that."

The real fruit of repentance is a life that turns away from the sin you've acknowledged. It's not constantly just going back and forth and giving my emotions a workout. Sure, you're sorry, but have you changed?

If there is true repentance, time will tell. It;s all about a life-change.

What Love is

2006-02-08T00:37:00.000+08:00

1Corinthians 13: 4-8

v4 - Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud.

v5 - It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no records of wrongs.

v6 - Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth.

v7 - It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

v8 - Love never fails.

Happy New Year!

2006-02-06T22:13:00.000+08:00

Happy New Year everybody!

Since the start of this year, life has been really happening... and got a really big surprise from someone I know...

Now, Im feeling pretty slacked, tired and demoralised although I don't look like that on the surface... But I know I won't stay this way for too long... Waste of time! :p

To make myself feel better, I shall look at the photo of my beloved Hubby! Haha! :p

Darling, I can't take my eyes off you! :D

Ok, I felt much better now! Haha! Anyway, my father's new Altis is coming in March or April! Finally! He He! :p

Talking about cars makes me think about my dream car, the Beetle Convertible!

You will be mine one day! Hehe... :P

My New Year Eve

2006-01-02T11:15:00.000+08:00

On 31 December 2005, 1am, I nearly lost my life. I was involved in a road accident while driving my father's car.

I was going home after eating supper with Charles and Jonathan, and was travelling along Ang Mo Kio Ave 1. After I checked to make sure no cars is around, I made a right turn towards Marymount Road. Out of a sudden, a blue Mitsubishi Lancer came towards me from the opposite lane at a fast speed and hit the top left portion of my car.

My car turned and stopped. The blue Lancer continued to hit another 2 cars which were stationery.

The first thing I saw when I opened my eyes were the air bags and the smoke coming from my car and I felt pain on my chest area. I immediately opened the car door and get out of the car. I was in shock and don't know what to do. I called my dad and told my dad I met with an accident, I don't know what to do and I'm very scared. Then I called Charles and Jonathan to come down and help me out.

I went to the pavement and sat down, realised that my chest got abrasions, my right foot has some cuts.

Then came all the waiting, Charles and Jon came down, Police and ambulance came down, Mr Policeman asked questions, we called for the towing service and I wait and wait and wait, pray and pray and pray...

There was a man who said he is a insurance agent and asked me stuffs then say I got to pay at least 3 to 4k...etc. "Thank him so much" for telling me all that when I was still in shock.

Finally at about 3am, the police say I can go but I got to make a trip down to Traffic Police Department at Ubi Ave 3. So I went to Ubi and the inspector took down my statement.
I got home at 4 am and tried to sleep.

I woke up at 7am to help my dad find the certificate of insurance for the car, then went to the Toyota Service centre to see how bad is the car. The service man says that he hasn't completed the list but it already costs us $36000 and more to repair the car.

Which really means we have to say sayoonara to the car cos we paid 60k for the car, no point repairing it. But thank God the insurance has a "Old for New" Policy which states that if the car is bought in less than 1 year and the accident caused the car to be in a total loss. They will replace a new car for us, same model same type...etc.

But I still have to pay $3000 because I'm an unnamed driver, and is under 26 yrs old with less than 2yrs of driving experiences.

I went to NUH after that for a check up. Spent 3 hours there doing X Ray, injection and cleaning of wounds... Thank God that my injuries are only superficial and the X Ray shows that I'm alright.

When I reached home, it's already 3 plus. I have to reach Expo for church service at 5pm. So I faster packed my stuffs and go to church.

I really thank the Lord for his faithfulness... Though I was so tired, whole body aching and in pain, but the Lord never let me go. During the service, He comforts my soul with His Words and encourages me to move forward...

The sermon says:

Don't Look Back at the Old Sins that have been Forgiven.
Don't Look Back at the Old Defeats that get you Down.
Don't Look Back at the Old Conflicts that make you Bitter.
Don't Look Back at the Old Victories and think you have Arrived.

Instead:

Look Up and know that the Lord is going to make us stronger!
Look Out at the challenges that you going to meet and know that the best is yet to come!

No one has a perfect life, no one is perfect. But the Lord is. And He has more faith in us than we have in ourselves. Trust in the Lord with all our heart and soul and the Lord will always carry us through all our problems, no matter big or small.

I thank God for year 2005 and I prayed that the Lord will continue to guide and lead me to a Christ-centred life and live according to His Words and His timing and perfect plan for me.

Interesting pictures during Revelation Day!

2005-12-30T17:26:00.000+08:00

Here are some more interesting pictures during Revelation Day! Enjoy! ;)

Windson looking satisfied to be able to get Aidil to wear this "nice" underwear! :)

Choon Hui and Arvind Getting "Married"! Faris is the "Priest! Haha!

Faris and Choon Hui hugging in surprise after finding out that Choon Hui is her adopted angel!

Oops! Poor boy!

Kissing Time!

Claudine's Doggy! So cute!

That's all folk! :)

MDC's Revelation Day

2005-12-30T16:14:00.000+08:00

We had alot of fun during Revelation Day cum Christmas Party at MDC last Thursday!

Starting from Mid dec, we were playing this game called Kris Kringle which was like the Angel Mortal game where we have to buy gifts for our Mortal (we call them "Baby") according to themes each day til Revelation Day...

So on Revelation Day, all angels announced their babies and many was surprised! I was one of them... Haha... I never imagined my angel to be Mdm Shida! And she bought me a nice pink sweater! So sweet of her! I felt so gulity for not buying much stuffs for her! :p

I was even more surprised by Choon Hui when she announced that she's my adopted angel, Sweet Heart and Smarties! She has been very sweet by buying me stuffs to encourage me... We both broke down n cried cos I felt so touched! Haha...

Aslinda was Scen-sa-tional who bought us lots of nice earrings! So nice of her! And there's Taki, Arvind, Mahmud, Jane, Aidil and Claudine who bought stuffs for everybody!

There's so many nice people in MDC! Really felt so happy to be part of this big family!

Here are the pictures! Enjoy!

Our MDC Family!

Christmas Tree and all the presents!

Wow, good food!

Me and Taki with our white Baby G limited edition couple watches!

Sisters looking gorgerous!

CBM, LJT, CBB! Don't ask me what they mean!

Me and David!

Me and my "Baby" Shi Wei!

Me and Mr Nice Boy, Willy!

Choon Hui and Willy, y she look so cheeky? haha!

Arvind!

2005-12-30T13:30:00.000+08:00

I really want to dedicate this entire post to our dear Arvind!

Haha....

During our Christmas Party at MDC last Thursday, we have this award ceremony and our dear Arvind won the Biggest Breasts Award! Wahahaha!

Here are the pics!

I'm sure Arvind won't mind me posting his pictures cos

EVERYBODY LOVES ARVIND! :D

G Force

2005-12-30T12:58:00.000+08:00

Jonathan,

I think it's better to put in group photos rather than just your photo to glorify yourself...

Hahaha...I know I'm mean but I don't care! Hahaha...:p

Here's two photos to put in your G Force blog...

Hehe... Jeremy looks good! Haha... So handsome! :p

Christmas

2005-12-22T09:18:00.000+08:00

Yeah! My exam week is over!!!!!

Haha... This week has been a stressful week for me as you can see from my previous post... Hehe... But I thank the Lord for carrying me and guiding me through this period of time...

You know, I always do a little prayer before every exam or performance, thanking the Lord for all that He has done for me. Not because of who I am but because of what He did, not because of what I've done, but because of who You are. He is the only One who can bring me strength, comfort and courage for all the things that I need to do. After the prayer, I always felt peace and much more confident in my exam or performance.

It's always through times of testing where we know even more that we need the Lord. I was doing my drama exam, which is a monologue, where every artiste, one by one has to stand on stage and talk to the audience for 2 minutes.

I shared about my relationship with my ex-boyfriend and how during my period of depression, I don't why but I picked up my Bible and I started to read. And the Lord speaks to me through His Words and comfort me, telling me I can always go to Him, He will always be there for me.

My Father in Heaven wants me back, even though I chose to rebel from Him, even though Im a terrible sinner, even though I chose to ignore His presence, His words...

And in order to save me, He did this:

John 3:16-17 - "For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life. For God dis not send his Son into the world to condemn the world, but to save the world through him."

In 3 days we celebrate Christmas, the birth of our Saviour, Jesus Christ.

To me, It's not only about exchanging presents, eating log cakes and turkey, saying Merry Christmas to one another...

It reminds me of how our Lord, Jesus Christ died for my sins...

1Peter 3:18 - "or Christ died for sins once for all, the righteous for the unrighteous, to bring you to God. He was put to death in the body but made alive by the Spirit."

I really thank the Lord for His love and faithfulness...

You know, I always thought I need a companion, a guy to share my life with me... But after my monologue, I realised the best companion I can ever have is God with the perfect love.

I went to watch the Vocal Essemble guys perform yesterday at Jurong Swimming Complex. They sang a song "What I want for Christmas".

I sang along in my heart, telling the Lord "All I want for Christmas is You..."

Exams Exams

2005-12-15T22:08:00.000+08:00

It's been freaking long since I last updated my blog... I tell you why...

Yesterday we just finished our 4th Quarter Vetting in which i was supposed to dance in 3 technically demanding pieces...

Tomorrow - Music Theory Grade 2 Exam & MDC Roadshow
Saturday - Outside Show at Ritz Carlton

Next Week:
Monday - Chereography Exam
Tuesday - Vocal Exam & Dance Exam
Wednesday - Drama Exam & Hip Hop Exam
Friday - Roadshow

Not forgetting there's Luigi Exam anytime next week. Don't know which day I will be picked cos they will tell u u r taking the exam on the day itself.
"Thank You" so much, Mr Luigi for inventing Luigi...

Now the "beansprouts" of my music theory book are staring at me and I wish that I can literally plucked off their heads one by one...

Life in MDC

2005-11-05T19:30:00.000+08:00

Sorry people! I know im blogging only like once a month cos Im really busy... ya i know im having my one week off this week... and I admit that sometimes Im just plain lazy to switch on my computer and blog... :p

Anyway, things have been going pretty well for me... Im happy in MDC, but sometimes feel that Im catching up too slowly... pretty demoralising sometimes when u realised how inadequate you are... But Im trying my best and will never give up... One day, by God's grace, I will be able to achieve what I set to do...

It's a great place for learning... Ryan's Hip Hop Class, Zaini's Dance Class, Music Theory Class, Vocal Class, Drama Class, Compere Class... Plus all the things I had learned from the performances I did and during rehearsals...

So now u all know why im always so busy ya? Haha...

Anyway... Wanna talk a little about the MDC people... Most of them are great! And I had fun hanging out with them... Like going Heeren to support Jonathan's group, Streetboyz in their recent performance, going to David's house for Lamb Party and going KTV with Yutaki, Bryan... etc. I really enjoyed myself... had so much fun.. hehe...

Btw, Im going Bangkok in December! Yeah Yeah! Haha... Will do lots and lots of shopping! Haha...

Got to stop here cos Im going out... Hehe... will post some pics when Im free... Which is don't know when... hehe... :p

Flu

2005-10-19T18:42:00.000+08:00

Down with flu today... Must be becos of the rain... Raining so heavily these few days...

I don't like the feeling of not going to work... Cos

No 1 - Miss rehearsals

No 2 - You know you have to work doubly hard to catch up the next day

No 3 - You caused inconvenience to those in the same rehearsals as you

No 4 - I miss dancing

No 5 - I miss the ppl there, esp Choon Hui!

Haha... Im much happier since I went to MDC... ya, there's ups and downs... But most of the time, I enjoyed myself learning and performing with these ppl...

Thanks to everybody who has shown concern towards me yesterday... A super embarrassing thing happened to me yesterday! Well, I don't wanna elaborate...
But thank God, no one noticed I think!

Tomorrow is vocal class and I haven't decided what songs to sing yet! We have to prepare one English song and one Chinese song... Haiz...Gonna crack my brain now...

Finally Update

2005-10-13T22:51:00.000+08:00

I finally update my blog... it's been ages since i updated my blog... well, can't help it... been super busy dancing from Monday to Saturday every week...

Anyway, just wanna write something about the NUS Dance Ensemble concert - The Next Waves 05 that i watched last sunday...

There's this particular chereography that really really touched my heart...

REQUIEM FOR A DREAM...
Chereography by Bryan Lee

"The pain of lost love is familiar yet fathomable. Unfulfilled promises, dashed dreams and unrealizded hopes. We struggle just to withstand the numbing blow of shock and disbelief. Memories flood our minds in waves amplifying the horror that has been wrought. Only in forgetting can we try to resist the temptation of surrendering to despair..."

I cried while watching the chereography.... Bryan, when u explained ur dance piece to me, you really touched every piece of my broken heart...

My newborn goddaughter!

2005-09-20T16:26:00.000+08:00

Yesterday my goddaughter was born! Her name is Tan Xiao En! She came to this world at 0923 hrs... Hehe... Weight: 3240 grams... Haha...

Went to visit her and her mum and dad... hehe... Here are her pics!

Xiao En opened her eyes! She's sooo cute... ;p

Hmm... She looks like she's about to cry... Hehe... no lah, just yawning!

Can't take my eyes off you! Haha...

Lynn n Xiao En

Poh Huat n Xiao En

Here's a boy born the day before Xiao En was born... Prospective boyfriend for Xiao En... Hehe... Qing Mei Zu Ma! Haha... Actually the parents know each other... Haha...

Suntec Dance Group Photos

2005-09-11T22:00:00.000+08:00

Ladies and Gentlemens, I present to you, LE DANZ!

My Dad and Mum

2005-09-10T21:05:00.000+08:00

You know, I always thought my parents don't love each other much. Well, from the moment I started learning about relationships, I only see my parents quarrelling or when they do talk, it sounds like shouting.

Of cos, I have never see them show concern for each other before. Well, guess it's not that type of concern that I imagined. And also, they being traditional chinese, feel embarrassed showing emotions openly.

I did heard from my mum about those days when they are dating...etc.

And there was one Valentine Day when I received flowers from my ex-boyfriend at my house. My parents were there and they happened to see it. After that, my mum was rattling on about they never celebrate Valentine Day, never receive flowers from my dad...etc. Know what my dad did, he took out all the money in his wallet which was 60 bucks and gave it to my mum and asked her to buy something she likes.

Haha... Well, other than that, I still don't really feel that they love each other much. To me, it's more of the obligations than real love for each other. I never see them close to each other before.

But today I have a very interesting encounter. I was eating dinner with my parents. My dad bought ice jelly, then my mum was saying she has diabetes so can't eat. My dad said "Aiyoh, a little bit never mind lah", then he scoped one spoonful and fed my mum! Wah, I nearly spit out my sugar cane! Haha...

After dinner, on the way back in the car, we were talking about cars and don't know how it leads to my parents' date at Jurong Bird Park when they were young.

Haha... they were saying that they still remembered that the glass of orange juice cost $12! And it was like more than 20 yrs ago, when 10 cents can buy yourself a drink!

So they keep on saying about it's so expensive and my dad spent almost $100. Cos he bought 5 glasses of orange juice and other stuffs...

I asked him, "why you buy 5?" Haha... He said that my 5th uncle went also, I think my auntie went also, and I guessed there was someone else too... Haha... then my mum asked my dad why he asked my 5th uncle to go? haha... then my dad says "I didn't ask him to go! He wants to come along himself and cos my sister also coming!"

Haha... I was looking at them having this conversation and I can see the smiles on their faces. And how they laughed together.

At that moment, my parents were thinking about their memories with each other.

I guessed they do love each other. But this love is no longer the kind of couple love. It's more of the family love, like my love for my mum and dad.

I feel so happy knowing that my parents do love each other. At this moment when I totally lost hope in any kind of relationship in guys, this kinda comforts me...

Anyway, here's a picture of my beloved dad and mum... haha...

Tired and Moody

2005-09-07T00:08:00.000+08:00

I'm too tired and moody to blog recently... feeling the stress coming up... Will be back here soon when I got my energy back...

Suntec dance pics will still be posted though we didn't got into the finals... Good learning experience...

Well... feeling very tired now... wanna sleep liao... ciao...

Do-Re-Mi

2005-08-20T00:26:00.000+08:00

One particular niggling piece of Unfinished Business, it occurred to me the other day in the middle of a singing session with my five-year-old daughter, is the lyrics to "Do-Re-Mi" from The Sound of Music.

It doesn't exactly rank as a global crisis, but nevertheless it brings me up short anytime I hear it, and it shouldn't be that difficult to sort it out.

But it is.

Consider.

Each line of the lyric takes the name of a note from the solfa scale, and gives its meaning: " Do (doe), a deer, a female deer; Re (ray), a drop of golden sun," etc. All well and good so far.

"Mi (me), a name i call myself; Fa (far), a long, long way to run." Fine. I'm not saying this is Keats, exactly, but it's a perfectly good conceit and it's working consistently. And here we go into the home stretch.

"So (sew), a needle pulling thread." Yes, good.

"La, a note to follow so..." What? Excuse me? "La, a note to follow so..." What kind of lame excuse for a line is that?

Well, it's obvious what kind of line it is. It's a placeholder. A placeholder is what a writer puts in when he can't think of something and come back and fix it later. So, i imagine that Oscar Hammerstein just bunged in "a note to follow so" and thought he'd have another look at it in the morning.

Only, when he came to have another look at it in the morning, he couldn't come up with anything better. Or the next morning. come on, he must have thought, this is simple. Isn't it? "La... a something, something...what?"

One can imagine rehearsals looming. Recording dates. Maybe he'd be able to fix it on the day. Maybe one of the cast would come up with the answer. But no. No one manages to fix it. And gradually a lame placeholder of a line became locked in place and is formally part of the song, part of the movie, and so on.

How difficuly can it be? How about this for a suggestion? "La, a..., a..."...well, I can't think of one at the moment, but I think that if the whole world pulls together on this, we can crack it. And I think we shouldn't let the century end with such a major popular song in such an embarrassing state of disarray.

Douglas Adams

The Salmon of Doubt

More Pics of NDP Show

2005-08-15T22:07:00.000+08:00

hehe... missed out some pics...

Choon hui with Bryan attempting some stunts! Wahaha!

Two Handsome Guys - Bryan and Yutaki!

Me with Cool and Friendly Bryan!

National Day Parade 2005

2005-08-10T14:04:00.000+08:00

Yeah!!! Finally NDP is over!!! It was not bad... I enjoyed myself though was feeling quite tired...

Anyway... below are the pics... hehe...

Choon hui and me before the show!

Choonhui, me and Wara!

Us again!

Vainpot posing! hah!

Choon Hui and me looking cool!

Choon Hui looking ready to dance and rock the stage!

Me relaxing after the show!

Choon Hui with handsome and stylo Yutaki!

Me with handsome and stylo Yutaki! Wish he's mine!!! Wahaha! Of cos, that's fat hope!

Do we look alike? haha...

Close shot of cool Choonhui... ;p

NDP Preview

2005-07-30T22:56:00.000+08:00

Finally... one more show left... hope it will be fun... It's wasn't so nice today... nobody has the mood to party...

But we changed costumes! And it's nice sporty outfits... very suitable for one of the piece, crunch goodies...

Choon Hui's was too big for her though... Though MDC wanna reuse the costumes but giving Male M is kinda too big for a small size girl like Choon Hui ya?

Will post some pictures when I bring my camera for the next show... Til then... Chill out...

Jazz Dance?

2005-07-25T23:56:00.000+08:00

Here's something from Dance Magazine (August 2004):

Vicki Adams Willis, artistic director of the Calgary, Alberta-based Decidedly Jazz Danceworks, insists that Jazz dance can't exist without jazz music.

As for jazzy pieces set to pop music, she says, "I just wish it wasn't called Jazz. Pop music resonates through body in a very different way, and the resulting movement aesthetic is very different from what would happen if you danced to jazz and honored the music."

Hmm... Is she being too harsh? But when we say jazz dance, what is it that we are really saying?

Hmm... dancers... what you think?

My First NDP show

2005-07-24T23:30:00.000+08:00

Yesterday was the first performance i did for MDC... NDP preview...

Overall, it was fun lah... never experience something like that before...

Initially dun feel good cos alot of last minute changes here and there... and as usual, something not very good will happen to me before an important event... in this case, my "auntie" came to visit without me preparing for it... I was wearing white jazz pants! Haha...
But everything was ok in the end... except that i felt bloated... haha...

And im supposed to wear this... haha...

When i wore it with my sports bra, I feel like like that those girls walking around cars during those car shows!! haha... except im not so pretty... hehe...

Anyway, I watched the guys doing the parachutes show and the fireworks! Nice nice! haha... It's even nicer when the skies turn dark and the audience waves their torches... hehe...

MDC is doing the NDP post show.... we were distributed around the round centre stage...
Wah, really alot of people... but many are going off... mainly left the perfomers...

But the performers,mainly secondary school students are great audience! After we finished the first and second pieces, we were supposed to dance and jump around like mad woman... for 45 mins!

They will scream and shout with us, get high and dance with us when we dance free style in front of them! Great young ppl!

Something funny happened to me, one group of boys and girls caught hold of one of our dancers and asked him to pull me to the group, apparently, a young cute boy was wanting to see me! wahahaha! So i went over and say Hi! The boy at first was bending down, hiding sia! haha! So cute!

But it was damned tiring (We did only 2 out of 4 dance pieces)... but very fun!

Looking forward to next saturday!

For Dance Performance at Padang

2005-07-19T11:46:00.000+08:00

11 July - Learn 2 new hard dance pieces in one day

18 July - Again learn 2 new dance pieces in one day. 1 piece have parts ABC, the sequence? A-B-8 bars of 8 doing free style-A(half)-C... something like that... seriously, im very blur now. got to ask Choon hui...
Second piece - Cannot count, listen to the lyrics and dance accordingly. Good. I dun have the song with me! and alot of parts i not sure when to start...

21 July - Blocking at Padang

23 July - Performance at Padang

Fast ya?

Yesterday danced 5 hours non-stop... muscles are aching... bones are cracking...

Haha... But a good learning experience...

Stressed Up

2005-07-14T18:49:00.000+08:00

Haiz... have been feeling so stressed up lately... Actually is after Monday rehearsal at MDC...

When i reached there, Bryan just look straight at me and say, "I think you going to have a difficult time later..." I was thinking, "Oh my god, jia lat, wat am i going to do?"

And he was super accurate about it, the steps are super duper difficult! Especially the second piece! Almost no steps are repeated and we have to finish learning 2 dance pieces by the end of the day... Wah, it was very overwhelming...

One of the dance pieces is more hip hop style which is my weakest genre... I cant really do hip hop!!! Hardly went for any hip hop class before!

By the end of the day, I was feeling really demoralised... I just feel so lousy and limited... to the extent that it makes me feel that Im not cut out to be a dancer...

But someone say this to me, "Nobody knows how to walk in the first place, ppl will improve with time. Only obstacle is themselves. No person going after their dreams will walk an easy road."

Haha... didn't know he can say such profound words sia... wahaha...

Im really glad that Choon hui is around to help me up... Otherwise, I will be dead meat for sure... Thanks ah, gal...

Though i still can't do it very well but I will try my very best to keep on practising til I got it right!

I will not give up! I'm going to MDC full time! If this obstacle makes me fall down and I don't pick myself up, then I will really going to be a failure in future.

Not going to let myself be defeated!

Le Danzer

2005-07-04T18:00:00.000+08:00

Just suddenly feel like posting pictures of Le Danzer! Everytime I looked at them I will feel so proud of us all! Don't u feel we look cool and pretty? haha!

Enjoy...

Our First Public Performance (NTU Hall 10 - Love Bites at HDB Hub, Toa Payoh)

Our Second Major Performance (SP Dance and Cheer - Waves 9)

Le Danzer in our "Miami" costumes with Susanty, the "Queen"

Curtain call of Waves 9

Le Danzer during our Sentosa Outing!

Last Pose in the Party Piece during Lovebites performance!

Super nice costumes, Super nice Pose!

Initial D

2005-07-03T17:24:00.000+08:00

Went to watch Initial D with Munseng last Thursday! Wah, I love the cars, the speed, everything! Except Jay Chow's acting.

Ok, I mean, his face always have this dead expression that will not change... I guess that's him and I heard from my friend that the character is supposed to be like that, cool cool shy shy... and ya it's his first attempt at acting... but but but... i nearly burst out laughing when he cried in the movie...

Like what Munseng said, it's like a kid crying cos mum don't wanna buy sweet or toy for him! i know Shujun is going to kill me for saying this but sorry gal, I really think his acting sucks... and I had a great time laughing at his lousy acting... wahahaha... Evil girl...

Other than that, the whole movie is great! All the cool cars, the cool AE 86 with the 250Hp engine, the powerful drunk and crazy dad who's so pro at modifying the car... All the drifting... etc... Wow... I will get very excited when I see them talking abt the modifying of the cars, the driving techniques... etc... haha... I really love this kind of movie... haha..

Few weeks ago, I went to IMM and the actual AE 86 was there... I took a picture... hehe... so cool...

Anyway, im a weird girl who likes cars and loves driving... haha... I have a fun time driving my dad's 1600cc Red Devil (Toyota Altis) for the past 3 days! Haha... now addicted to driving... hahaha...

CLEARED

2005-07-01T16:50:00.000+08:00

Hmm... 1st of July 2005! 10 more working days and Im going to be free from my boring office job! Haha... :p

It feels great man! Today I finally cleared my Japan Trip debt. Though the rest of the month I might be chewing on bread and drinking plain water, haha... but I felt a sense of relief.

Finally, I don't owe him anything anymore. The more things I cleared, the more I feel I can move on in my life happily and look forward to more good things in life!

There's this big box in my room, carefully sealed and stated "DO NOT OPEN TIL U R HAPPY AGAIN". I kept all my memories with him in this box. Maybe one day i will open it and not feel hurt anymore. I hope i can open it one day with a smile and think only of the sweet memories...

Life goes on and I look forward to achieving my dreams and be happy.

Btw, blur me didn't know that my settings have been set such that only bloggers can add comments to my blog!

Haha... anyway, I changed that, so now everyone can add comments to my blog!

Haha... feel free ya? Hmm... sleepy now...

Clubbing at Double O on 10 June 05

2005-06-26T02:34:00.000+08:00

Haha... finally got the clubbing pictures from Munseng...

The clubbing and chalet were really fun! Silly me fell down from the dance platform somemore... Anyway, below are the pictures 3 chio bus and 1 ducky (That's me) took before going down to double o... hahaha...

Changing Image 2

2005-06-22T14:45:00.000+08:00

I finally able to make some real changes to my image... haha... I did a number of things throughout this 2 months and it feels great... haha!

First, I finally picked up the courage to pierce my earlobe. I have never pierce my earlobe in my entire life til now... Anyway, I only pierce my right earlobe cos just dun feel like piercing both earlobes, think it's unique.... haha... but most think is silly... haha... but i like can liao...

Then I went to trim my eyebrows... never did that before cos someone who used to be important to me dun like it, think it's not natural... anyway, heck care, i did it now and Im happy about it! Well, i went to a salon at "ulu" Taman Jurong shopping centre... the lady boss did it for me... she's so pro,fast and clean... i come out with a really neat look... i love it.. cos i want my face to look neat! hehe...

Finally, the big change... Went to It's Hairy at Far East Plaza to cut my hair! I got the Creative Director to cut the hair for me... and wow... he is a real pro... not only was he able to guide me to hairstyles that he thinks will suits me, he asked for my occupation and what kind of length im comfortable with... Then he say let's go and he go about cutting my hair confidently...
The result... a fantastic punk and stylo hairstyle and shows out my highlight better than last time!

Haha... I love my new look... Evil punk girl! haha! See below for my Before and After!

The Old Fion with the Sweet Look

The New Fion with the Punk Look

So what you all think of the new look? haha!

A Fantastic Day!

2005-06-21T13:20:00.000+08:00

20 June 2005. The best day i had in months!

Ever since the horrible month of May, I felt so aimless... Not looking forward to anything in life, just live life day by day, not very sure what i want. Yes, i have let go of the relationship but im not sure about my directions anymore. I have changed you see...

But today! Claudine from SAF Music and Drama Company called! She confirmed that Im accepted into MDC and is getting me for their part time assignments in July and August, which is a series of NDP performances! Straight after my last day of work, which is 15 July...

Haha... was really happy! Msg many friends to share my joy! haha... guess my new hairstyle brings me luck! Haha! Crap!

Went for a mini celebration with my ex-colleagues! Had so much fun and laughter chatting with them!

Then i reached home and went online to print resume for a friend, then thinking, hey, might as well check out my SAT scores.

I scored 1500! Can't believe my eyes... Right now, i still doubt if I counted wrongly... but 530 plus 530 plus 440 is equal to 1500. Guess im right...

Apparently, It's a high score from wat i heard from my friends! Hmm... no idea man...

Haha... though it's of no use to me now, i still feel happy!

Fantastic Day! Im so happy! haha! ;p

A Story

2005-06-19T13:16:00.000+08:00

A ninety-one year old woman died after living a long dignified life.
When she met God she asked him something that had long bothered her.
If Man was created in God's image, and if all men are created equal, why do people treat each other so badly?

God replied that each person who enters our life has a unique lesson to teach us. And it is only through these lessons that we learn about life, people, relationships and God. This confused the woman, so God began to explain.

When someone lies to you it teaches you that things are not always as they seem. The truth is often far beneath the surface. Look beyond the masks people wear if you want to know their heart.And remove your own masks to let people know yours.

When someone steals from you it teaches you that nothing is forever. Always appreciate what you have, for you never know when you might lose it. And never ever take your friends and family for granted because today is the only guarantee you have.

When someone mocks you it teaches you that no two people are alike.

When you encounter people who are different from you, don't judge them by how they look or act; instead base your opinion on the contents of their heart.

When someone breaks your heart it teaches you that loving someone does not always mean that person will love you back. But don't turn your back on love because when you find the right person, the joy that one person brings will make up for all the past hurts put together. Times ten.

When someone holds a grudge against you it teaches you that everyone does mistakes.

When you are wronged, the most virtuous thing you can do is forgive the offender without pretense. Forgiving those who have hurt us is the most difficult and courageous thing Man can do.

When a loved one is unfaithful to you it teaches you that resisting temptation is Man's greatest challenge. Be vigilant in your resistance against all temptation. By doing so you will be rewarded with an enduring sense of satisfaction far greater than the temporary pleasure by which you were tempted.

When someone cheats you, it teaches you that greed is the root of all evil.

Aspire to make your dreams come true, no matter how lofty they may be. Do not feel guilty about your success, but never let an obsession with achieving your goals lead you to engage inmalevolent activities.

Upon hearing the Lord's wisdom, the old woman became concerned that there were no lessons to be learned from Man's good deeds.

God replied that Man's capacity to love is the greatest gift he has. At the root of all kindness is love, and each act of love also teaches us a lesson.The woman's curiosity deepening, God once again began to explain.

When someone loves us it teaches us that love, kindness, charity, honesty, humility, forgiveness and acceptance can counteract all the evil in the world.

For every good deed, there is one less evil deed. Man alone has the power to control the balance between good and evil, but because the lessons of love are not taught often enough, the power is too often abused.

When you enter someone's life, whether by plan, chance or coincidence, consider what your lesson will be. Will you teach love or a harsh lesson of reality?

When you die will your life have resulted in more loving or hurting? More comfort or pain? More joy or sadness?

Letting Go

2005-06-16T17:32:00.000+08:00

把爱放开
歌手:飞儿乐队专辑:无限

我们的爱过了就不再回来
直到现在我还默默的等待

当你开始追寻你要的自由
放开我们紧握的手
带走我的爱和天空
我不知所措我以为我会懂
我们的爱我们的爱

当我独自走到时间的尽头
回忆和我擦身而过
带走你的爱和笑容
我无力承受最后的一点心痛
我们的爱我们的爱

把爱放开把手放开
如果你的心已不在
把爱放开不再等待
你的温柔是一片空白

把爱放开把心打开
这次我决定走出回忆重来
就让我彻底地伤再彻底地醒过来
就让我彻底地伤再彻底地醒过来
啊......

这次我决定走出所有回忆重来
就让我彻底地伤再彻底地醒过来
就让我彻底地伤再彻底地醒过来

终于明白爱已不再
从今以后再也没有什么能去依赖
我还有什么期待

The power of Chinese. Sometimes no English words can fully describe one's feelings... For me, I find that Chinese words can and are closer to my heart.

I have finally let go. There are better things in life waiting for me.

There is someone who all the while is beside me, supporting me. Just that in my sorrows I have not realised it.

But my heart is empty... It refuses to accept anyone in.

If a girl cries

2005-06-08T06:00:00.000+08:00

If a girl cries in front of u, it means that she can't take it anymore.

If u take her hand,she would stay with u for the rest of ur life;
If u let her go, it wil be hard for her to goback to being herself with you once again.

A gal wont cry easily; except in front of the person whom she loves the most, she becomes weak.
A gal wont cry easily; only when she loves u the most, she put down her ego.

Guys, if a gal cries bcoz of u, please hold her hands firmly, coz she's the one who is willing to stay with u 4 for the rest of ur life.
Guys, if a gal cries bcoz of u, please dont give her up,maybe bcoz of ur decision, u'll ruin her life.

When she cries right in front of u,
When she cries bcoz of u,
Look into her eyes, Can u see n feel the pain n hurt she's feeling?

Think.

Which other girl has cried with pure sincerity, In front of u, And bcoz of u?

She cries not because she is weak, She cries not bcoz she wants sympathy or pity, She cries,

Because crying silently is no longer possible, the pain, hurt n agony have bcome too big a burden to be kept inside.

Guys, Think about it, If a gal cries her heart out to u, and all because of u,
Its time to look back on wat u have done,
Only u will know the answer to it.

Do consider it, Coz one day,
It may be too late for regrets,
It may be too late to say "im sorry".

New Life Starts

2005-06-01T23:33:00.000+08:00

Finally! Today is the first of June! The horrible month of May is finally over!

From now on, I will start my life anew, single, but happy!

Hope that my rainbow will come soon...

Hehe... Friday is my SAF Music and Drama Company Audition! Really hope I can get in and fulfil my and Choonhui's dreams...

SAT on Saturday... haiz... a bit more heck care about it... dun know why... maybe cos SMU can't get in liao... but still, since i spend so much money on it liao... i better work hard on it also...

Anyway, today will be a Happy Day! haha...

Left & Right Brain

2005-05-25T08:39:00.000+08:00

Hey ppl... try this... very interesting...

While sitting at your desk, lift your right foot off the floor and make clockwise circles.

Now, while doing this, draw the number "6" in the air with your right hand.

Your foot will change direction and there's nothing you can do about it.

Irony of The Story of DBG

2005-05-25T05:27:00.000+08:00

Quite a while ago, Someone I know wrote a Story about DBG. It's about a girl who has taken a guy's helpfulness and efforts for granted.

Here is what he wrote:
"To DBG, you are a spoilt little girl. You think I purposely made you all study those topics for fun? You think it's my fault a stupid shit test came out? You gonna take out your frustration over time wasted studying useless information on me? Well you can piss off then. No help will come to you until you learn to appreciate what the people surrounding you are doing for you. People may not know what is best. People may not know the future. But at least thank them for trying."

Reading this again at this moment of time makes me wanna puke.

Know why? Cos the person who wrote the Story about DBG treats someone the same way DBG treats him. TAKE SOMEONE FOR GRANTED.

Don't know since when he has taken a girl who has selflessly love and care about him for granted and stop appreciating what she has done for him.

She even has to ask for a thank you when she bought him breakfast to his hostel.

There was one day, the guy threw temper at her cos he was pissed off doing something for very long because of the girl and results in him going home late.

The girl was super upset, but still she didn't get angry and threw temper back at the guy cos she felt she was at fault.

She immediately bought dinner for him and brought it all the way to his hostel.
No thanks for that also.

Maybe he has got used to the fact that the girl will buy and bring meals to him... Maybe he thinks that the girl is obligated to do that. Maybe the girl is just fucking too nice.

Maybe the girl has also taken him for granted and he thought she deserves it?

I don't know. All I know is he no longer appreciates anything the girl has done for him.

It's ok if he don't appreciate cos the girl don't really mind. She is happy enough knowing he is happy.

But know what the guy did? He hurt her. And he did it continuously. Til the girl's heart is all bruised and broken and has since hardened.

Now the guy wants to break up with the girl. After hurting her so much, he did nothing to make her any better, instead he wants to push her to a bottomless pit.

Without her friends, the girl might not be able to pick herself up again. She might still be in depression now and don't know what to do.

You see, some people only know how to say. They don't do what they preach.

Which of cos sucks...

And sucks big time.

WORDS WOMEN USE

2005-05-24T04:41:00.000+08:00

Something interesting...

FINE
This is the word women use to end an argument when they are right and you need to shut up.

FIVE MINUTES
If she is getting dressed, this is half an hour. Five minutes is only five minutes if you have just been given 5 more minutes to watch the game before helping around the house.

NOTHING
This is the calm before the storm. This means "something," and you should be on your toes. Arguments that begin with 'Nothing' usually end in "Fine"

GO AHEAD This is a dare, not permission. Don't do it.

LOUD SIGH
This is not actually a word, but is a non-verbal statement often misunderstood by men. A "Loud Sigh" means she thinks you are an idiot and wonders why she is wasting her time standing here and arguing with you over "Nothing"

THAT'S OKAY
This is one of the most dangerous statements that a woman can make to a man "That's Okay" means that she wants to think long and hard before deciding how and when you will pay for your mistake.

THANKS
A woman is thanking you. Do not question it or faint. Just say you're welcome.

ROM

2005-05-20T16:17:00.000+08:00

Today, my colleague, Annie held her ROM at her house. I attended with my other colleagues during lunch time...

Wow, she looked gorgeous with her wedding gown and when she stood next to her hubby, they look like a match in heaven.

She dropped tears during the ceremony, she said cos it's so touching and she's so happy.

Im very happy for her, but i feel sad for myself. I dropped tears deep inside my heart.

Other than very few, no one in the office knew what happened between my boyfriend and I, So I have colleagues asking me "Fion, when is your turn?"

I really don't know how to answer them and deep down in my heart, there is this arrow stuck in and the pain is really unbearable. I felt like breaking down and cry out loud but I can't do that. How can I spoil people's ROM?

The bride came talking to me, telling me about her wedding package, the photos shots in Malaysia and advicing me what to do next time I got married and reminded me don't be like her and cried during the ceremony.

I don't know what to say to her except to say "hmm... I see, I see..." and tried to force a smile...

I have never felt such pain before... No words can describe and no one can understand.

It's not that I have not experienced break ups before. This time is different. Because being the naive Fion, I thought he is the one i will be spending the rest of my life, to love and behold...

I imagined us getting married, stay together in a small flat, go on honeymoon in Venice, have kids. I felt almost certain that all these will happen one day.

But like what Angela said, nothing is guranteed plus chop. The person who you love so much might just change one day.

You tell yourself not to be hurt again, but in the end, you end up with more sorrows than you ever had.

I just want to be happy in my life, I don't want to be rich, famous or successful... just simply happy and I can tell my grandchildren that ah ma had a happy life and have not regretted it.

Managers are useless bunch of craps

2005-05-19T03:15:00.000+08:00

I cannot imagine how useless someone can be in a company...

When I start working life, I was prepared to face all kinds of people.

But my company is damned extreme to the maximum... There's really ALL kinds of people here...

The first year when I was in the company was quite smooth sailing, colleagues are nice people who won't hide a knife behind their smiling faces.

But when that bunch of colleagues one by one leaves the company, and the people who replaces them starts to show their true colours, things became bad...

I have a MD who shouts at everybody he saw when he's in a bad mood and when he calls someone, he dun call them by name, he will start saying, "ah you you, wait, I want to talk to you." He still do that to me now even though im in this company for 2 years and he obviously know my name. Cos there was once he called my name when i purposely ignored his "ah you you". But of cos, special treatment is given to those who put their breasts on the MD table and talk to him in a super high and gentle pitch...

I have a GM who leads people as though they are soldiers. He really thought he is a commandor or officer or wat every shit in army... He likes to talk about leadership stuffs as if he's damned pro at it when he didn't realise that he actually sucks at it looking at the high staff turnover rate each year.
Oh, and not forgetting, he goes by the "F" management and shouts to everybody also when he's in bad mood, just like his father, the MD. Guess it's in the family blood.

I have a HR manager now who do nothing everyday except to talk to my GM in his room, walk around the third floor and gossip about children, clothes, guys...etc. When everybody is BUSY with their own stuffs and ignore her, she will go back to her desk and read her novel. Damned free... And it's a big contrast when I see the HR Executive beside her so busy that she has never go home on time from the first day she joins the company.

Then finally, my manager. Literally a bloody asshole. Before I went to Japan, I got a urgent pending task. Cos I won't be around to do it, I asked him if he can assist me in following up on the task. He say ok and I packed the documents nicely in a envelope and give specific instructions.
And what the fuck did he do? He screwed it up by losing the whole envelope.
When I came back, he said he lost it and I searched high and low for it but I can't find it anywhere. I do not have any copy with me.
I told him I can't find the documents HE LOST, know what he told me? "Fion, you go and settle it yourself."
WTF. Know what Im going to do? Ignore the god damned task and do nothing.
Im quitting soon anyway, so throw him to die.

Im amazed that Im still in this company now, typing this post. Throwing my resignation letter very very soon.

Supplier Guy

2005-05-16T22:04:00.000+08:00

Hmm... A few months back I know of a guy through my work... He came to my company trying to sell his company's service to me... So he got my namecard and there's my handphone number on it...

Anyway, he starts calling me at my office first. One day, he called and i was on mc. The next day he called and ask me how am i feeling, so I just entertain him a while. That day during lunch, he came down to my office, bringing me herbal tea, sweet and han chim pan... He says, the herbal tea is to help me recover faster, sweet is for me suck cos the herbal tea is bitter, then han chim pan is scare im hungry so buy for me to eat.

It's really sweet of him... And he started calling me quite often from then on.

But I don't know him well and at that time i was still attached. So i kinda ignore his advances...

Recently, he started to call me again, asking me if he can send me to work, fetch me home... etc... I turned all his offers down...

But with all the attention he's showing me, It kinda help me to forget all my unhappy stuffs for a while... and the fact that there's still someone willing to show me concern when another treats me like shit, makes me feel that my rainbow will come soon after a heavy rain...

Basically I dun have any feelings for the guy... hmm... but see how lah, someone says he's a good catch and he's quite good looking also...

Haha... but now no mood lah... concentrate on my dance and work and SAT first...

I'm back

2005-05-15T14:59:00.000+08:00

Im back from Japan!

Was a really enjoyable trip! really see alot of interesting stuffs...

Friends, im still surviving, so dun worry about me...

Yawns... im tired... will start posting about my trip once i got all my pics organized...

going sleep liao... ZZZZZzzzzzz....

Japan Trip

2005-05-05T23:56:00.000+08:00

I'm finally going Japan tonight.

No idea what I will do or what will happen... Just hope everything will go well and I will enjoy my trip.

Friends, don't worry about me, I will be strong and I will take good care of myself.

Life is so unpredictable sometimes... and it seems like my theory abt me always being unlucky before important events is kinda accurate...

Actually why am i making myself so pessimistic and negative?

I made a committment, and that's from 06/05/2005 onwards, Im going to be a positive person, I will be optimistic. I will be confident in myself and look at the good side of things...

Im unlucky one time doesn't mean I will be unlucky forever. We can always look forward to see rainbow after a heavy rain...

I will be happier this way and that kind of Fion makes my friends happy too.

Life is not only about yourself. It's about alot of other people around you. When I made someone smile today, I will smile and be happy also...

Anyway, no point hurting myself anymore. My life is more than a broken relationship.

Will post many many many many nice pictures in here when im back on 14/05/2005.

So everybody, take care and have a great day ahead!

Fairy Tale shit

2005-04-17T02:14:00.000+08:00

I watched a drama on TV yesterday...

It's about a loving couple, let's just call them the guy and the girl... haha...

Anyway, this couple was happily preparing for their wedding, they told their friends that their dream was to get married and have kids, watch their kids grow up through all stages of life... blah blah blah...

One day, they went to do their pre-marital medical check-up. They discovered a shocking new, the girl got cancer of the womb, and the only way to completely cure it is to remove the womb from the body. Which means that she can never give birth.

They were devastated. Their dream can never be fulfilled.

Then the bloody idiot guy disappeared. The girl is even more upset, she said she is not going for the operation. She wants to wait for the guy to come back to her.

With the help of some friends, they managed to find that guy. The guy explained that he is very confused, he don't know what to do, he just want to find somewhere quiet to think it over. He says he love her but loving her means accepting every part of her, so he don't know if he actually really love her. He was also worried that his parents cannot accept the girl.

The guy, upon hearing the advices from friends and that the girl refused to go for her operation, realised his folly and rushed to see the girl.

When the guy saw the girl, he hugged her and said, he don't need kids anymore, he's contented in life just by having her... blah blah... then they kissed and recounciled.

That's it. Happy Ending..

What the hell... in this realistic world, many guys will choose to abandon the girl due to pressure from parents, his own dream...etc and find another girl who can help him to fulfill his dream...

This world is cruel, there's no fairy tale... there are always guys out there who will let girls down and vice versa...

Happily ever after? Fuck off, It only exists in storybooks.

Meaningful stuff

2005-04-12T15:30:00.000+08:00

hmmm... the words below are really meaningful...

愛一個人，

要了解，也要開解；
要道歉，也要道謝；
要認錯，也要改錯；
要體貼，也要體諒；

是接受，而不是忍受；
是寬容，而不是縱容；
是支持，而不是支配；

是慰問，而不是質問；
是傾訴，而不是控訴；
是難忘，而不是遺忘；

是彼此交流，而不是凡事交代；
是為對方默默祈求，而不是向對方諸多要求；

可以浪漫，但不要浪費；
可以隨時牽手，但不要隨便分手。

不要輕言放棄！否則對不起自己

對妳用心，希望妳能體會，
對妳關心，希望妳能感動，
對妳真心，希望妳能珍惜；
讓妳窩心，是我的心願，
讓妳開心，是我的責任，
讓妳動心，是我的目標。

Changing Image

2005-04-10T20:25:00.000+08:00

Haiz.. I guess my plan to change my image is facing some difficulties!

I went to highlight and cut my hair today, kinda sick of my present look and so want a change...

I went to Sandstorm at Jurong Point. Well, first of all, the cute colour boy made a mistake and nearly coloured my whole hair! Lucky the stylist stopped him... otherwise I don't what my hair will look like now... haha... I was really puzzled at what he was doing actually...

Anyway, the end product of the highlight didn't come out very well...

Next, is the haircut, I wanted to cut my fringe short, but the stylist says he didn't want to cut it too short cos it will not show my highlight well... I was thinking my highlight didn't come out well anyway!

Then he refused to cut my hair length short cos he says I will look very young and don't suit me very well...

OK! He's a really firm hair stylist!

Anyway, here are my BEFORE and AFTER... give me some comments ya?

BEFORE

AFTER

Confident = Pretty

2005-04-05T13:07:00.000+08:00

People who knows what's going around me lately will realise that Im going through a dark period...

Well, I was. Crying myself to sleep every night and being super paranoid and weird... So unlike me. Most people think of me as a happy go lucky, crazy and funny girl...

But when you met the love of your life and things don't really go smoothly between the two of you, it does affect and change you a little, which is what happened in my case.

But all the getting upset, paranoid, worried and crying have made me uglier. I look at myself in the mirror this morning and realised I looked so haggard, like a auntie. I even spotted some lines near my eyes, hope they are not wrinkles! haha...

Suddenly I realised that I do not want to be look like this! Where is the confident Fion I used to be?

So now I tell myself, Im not allowing myself to be defeated. I still have alot of things that I want to try and do in my life and why am i wasting my time thinking and worrying about things that might not happen or are already in the past?

Well, Im a vain girl, most girls are! hehe... so Im going to be confident in myself, be happy and positive, and in no time, I will be as pretty as I used to be or maybe prettier!

Haha! thick-skinned ya? say Im a pretty girl... munseng and choon hui will say im a pretty duck! haha... well, make no difference to me anyway...

If the love of my life happens to read this, just want to let you know, I will be ok. But this doesn't mean you can take me for granted... So if you still treasure me, please put a little more thought and concern towards our relationship and think of what you wanna do k k? Thank you.

Lalalalaa....

Dark dark dark

2005-04-03T17:49:00.000+08:00

Sometimes I really wish that I do not have to grow up. I wish im a baby who only knows how to cry and drink milk... no need to care about anything other than when is my next meal..

As people grow old, things starts to get complicated. People start to worry more and wrinkles starts appearing...

Have to think about study, work, family, boyfriend, money, passion, health... etc.

It's really tiring sometimes...

I find myself quite a unlucky person. Maybe my pessimistic nature adds on to it.

Whenever there's an important occasion or event, I sure have something bad cropped up. Examples? I got chicken pox just one week before my dance performance. I got a bad case of rashes on Valentine Day, My Japan trip organised by SP was cancelled due to Sars... etc.

Strange ya? I dun understand it either... when i went to Australia, I was super worried that the plane will crash! Think im silly? Maybe im. Cos I never believe that nothing bad will happen to me during those important times. It always happened when I least expected it anyway.

Haha... Im finally going Japan in May. Hope the plane wun crash. If God really wants me to die, please do it at some secluded place where non of those closest to me is around. Actually I wish i can die in my sleep. Then i wun affect anybody...

Friends who are reading this, dun worry about me, Im just going through a dark period of my life... i will pick myself up soon i hope.

Guys just don't get it

2005-03-17T19:38:00.000+08:00

Guys always say girls think too much. The fact is guys think too little and they imagine too much...

It's hard to be a 'girlfriend'... What i mean here is a girl whom the guy will one day plan to marry or maybe if something cropped out, they won't.

Guys either imagine their girlfriend to be superwoman or a toy.

Superwoman - they expect their girlfriends to be totally understanding to what they have did and said, even if it sounds really ridiculous, for eg, wanting a female friend, other than their girlfriends, who can share ups and downs with them. They forgot we are human too, with feelings...

Toy - They expect their girlfriends to listen to whatever they say and to obey their words. If they say yes is yes, they say no is no. They might as well go and buy a sex doll...

They think we are kicking a big fuss if we got jealous over a girl whom he thinks he has no interest in. They expect their girlfriends to trust them even when they write a post in their blog abt that girl less than one week after they quarrelled over that particular girl.

What's the difference when they promised they won't talk about other girls again and the next moment they wrote about them?

Are we 'girlfriends' supposed to be taken for granted? To be as insensitive as them?

We do things for them not expecting anything back, we forgive them when they make mistakes. During their ups and downs, we are always there for them...

Do they ever realise it?

Well, my boyfriend don't. I told him straight off im jealous, i share with him my feelings... but nothing goes into his head. Now im not going to say anything anymore. To him, im superwoman.

He still can ask me if i mind he write about her. He ask me after he has already wrote it and posted it in his blog. Is he giving me a choice when he asked me that?
If he really minds how I feel, what's the point of asking only after he has wrote it?

Im utterly disappointed, but what else can i do? He has never written anything like that for me. I never expect him to cos he's not that kind of mushy person.

But he can write so well about someone else.

This is the last thing i saying about this thingy. Im keeping my bloody mouth shut from now on.

Jazz In The City

2005-01-29T21:51:00.000+08:00

Jazz in The City

Yah... I just bought the above CD today... It's so cool....

I first heard the songs yesterday in Orchard Library... you know, there's corners between the book shelves where you can sit down and read your book and then against the wall there's a headphone and a switch where you can choose the type of music through the channels...

Well, I choose Jazz... being my all-time favourite, then I heard "Nature Boy"... oh my god, I totally fall in love with it, then there's "What a Difference A Day Made"...

I was totally engrossed in the songs that I forgot to read my book... haha...

Anyway, I went to HMV today to see if I could find any CD with the songs, and I found it! Exactly what I have heard. And there's this voice in your head saying, "Fion buy it now!"

Haha, but being a typical shopping woman, I though HMV was selling it at a quite a high price ($20.95, well... it's a bit ex for a girl who haven't got her bonus yet!), so I went opposite, Cineleisure Sembawang Music to get it... Lucky me got it there at $18.90... haha... so remember guys, trust a woman when you want to buy stuffs...

Anyway, cut the story short, the CD is good... really good... some of my favourites are Nature Boy, Dream a Little Dream of Me, Crazy Little Thing Called Love, What A Difference A Day Made, Light My Fire... and alot more... haha... Actually all the songs are quite nice...

Well, enjoying it now... this CD... hmmm... should be 2 CDs... can last me for at least 2 weeks or more... haha... until my bonus comes and I can grab some more good stuffs... haha...

Anyway, Funkamania kinda sucks yesterday... standards dropped... but still some are good... can put in some pics when I have them...

Paul Taylor - Dancemaker

2005-01-16T22:38:00.000+08:00

I borrowed this fantastic dvd from Esplanade Library. It's about this dance chereographer and dancer, Paul Taylor.
Talking about his life, his works, his feelings, his inspirations and answered the whys of many people.
Paul Taylor can be considered one of the pioneers of Modern dance. He was with Martha Graham before he set up his own company, Paul Taylor Dance Company.
This dvd about him is quite comprehensive and intense. It glues me to the screen for the whole 90mins. This show was one of the nominee for Grammy awards. So cool...

Some of the ideas of his work are really quite interesting. Im just going to mention some.

There's one about him trying to show people about a dysfunctional family which he was in.
The dancers were all reaching out for one another but in the whole dance, they never touch each other at all.

Then there's another one called "Man is a social animal". At first, it shows him talking to important people and then there's a flashback to his dance. A group of men was wearing tuxedos on the stage. They were all moving strangely, like animals, with a certain routine, as if they are communicating with each other. And the fun part is it keeps flashing between Paul Taylor talking to some guys and the dance piece.
I find it really interesting.

The last one is a really cool one. It shows a girl, who lusts for man, she's sort of slutty but not really bad in character.
A group of men crowded around her, but when she approaches each one of them, all turn away from her. The whole dance was really quite intense and exciting.

I was really stuck on my chereography a few days before I watched this dvd. After i watched it, wow, it gives me incredible inspirations...

But im stuck again now... oh well... never mind... you will never know what you might come out with tomorrow... hope tomorrow will be a good day...

CRY

2005-01-01T09:00:00.000+08:00

Rain keeps pouring these few days. It's as if Heaven is mourning and crying for those poor souls who died in the Tidal Waves tragedy.

More than 100,000 has died. Right now, I still can't recover from the shock and grief. Everyday I watched the news online and on TV, the amount just keeps on increasing and I feel really upset and grieved looking at so many corpses lying around.

Never in my whole life have I seen so many corpses. Many are bloated, some with hands outstretched. I can imagine at their very last breath, they were still struggling to be alive, stretching their hands up to be saved. Looking at them always made me cry.

In the Bible, it says " We can rejoice too, when we run into problems and trials, for we know that they are good for us, they help us learn to endure." Romans 5:3

Yes, we will learn to endure this trial and try to continue living our lives. But to ask me to rejoice, I can't.
I know that when God allows this to happen, there is a purpose. This purpose which I as a sinful person can't comprehend.

Life is really fragile and unpredictable. One day you might be healthy and happily enjoying the riches and time with your loved ones, another day you might just lose everything and cease to exist in this world.

Today is the last day of 2004. This year has a lot of fortunate and unfortunate incidents which I felt the latter is more.
At midnight today, I will be stepping into 2005 alive, thinking of the many who didn't manage to do so and wondering if I will be able to step into 2006 alive too.

"God, though I do not understand why all these must happened but I still trust in you, the Almighty. I pray to you to be merciful and gracious to the survivors who need help and to watch over those who are with you now. Amen."

My two baby teeth

2004-12-19T11:05:00.000+08:00

18 Dec 2004... the day where I finally pulled out my two baby teeth which has been with me since... err... since... aiya... since it starts appearing in my mouth! HA!

MY BEFORE and AFTER

Actually I was super nervous when I step into the clinic cos it has been ages since I visited a dentist! haha!

I got even more nervous when I got into the room. The seat alone is terrifying with the light above you and machine beside you! wah!

I was so scared that i literally dragging my legs to the seat and kept playing with my fingers.

Obviously my dentist realised that so the first thing he says to me is "You nervous huh?" haha...

Well, he's really a Professional dentist, he looked at my baby teeth and concluded straight away that it's chicken feet to pull it out and i will have no pain at all!
Cos my teeth are already shaky and baby teeth are not connected to bones, only to gums.

So he numb my gums, which is a very weird feeling... then slowly pull out my teeth, I thought it will at least be a bit painful... but surprise surprise! I feel it being pulled out but there's no pain at all!

Haha, my dentist is so pro...

Anyway, he recommend me to his wife to put braces... hmmm... still considering though....

First time i enjoyed my time at the dentist! not very ex somemore... hehe...

Fion's First Post

2004-12-12T14:12:00.000+08:00

My first post. Find it really complicated to start. haha. I basically hate computers cos they reminds me of work. Reminds me of the huge numbers of procedures that I have to write!

Anyway, let's see how it goes, if i got it fixed, then I will continue. If not, forget it.

Im a dancer. I dun care much about all these stuffs anyway. HA!

LIVE TO DANCE AND DANCE TO LIVE!