Taking our position for granted

Yesterday I was really sick - flu, menses and back pain... felt really shitty... But as I got show at a camp so couldn't take mc... Anyway, I performed terribly... One of my worst shows...

The worst part is I left the stage not feeling very bad abt it, instead what's in my mind was to hurry pack up and go home.

I pondered about this after I went back home and realised that as a full time performer, whether conscious or not, we tend to take the stage for granted.

I remembered the moment before the first time I went on stage to dance. Sweaty palms, cold sweat breaking out at your forehead, heartbeats pounding faster and faster, legs felt wobbly... etc. If you are a performer, you will know what I mean.
At that moment, I felt it was such a privilege to be able to be on stage, I wanted to go on stage and do my best and show to the audience how much I love dancing, how much dancing means to me....

And the satisfaction and happiness I got from the audience's applause was really memorable...

So now, when performing on stage becomes a norm, something that I always do... I tend to forgot the joy of wanting to perform for the audience and how it is such a privilege for me to be able to perform full time...

You might have done a particular dance item for the nth time... you dun even have to think abt the steps, it just come to u naturally... but let's not do it for the sake of doing...

This is your nth time, but for the audience, this might be their first time watching you dance and the only time u might have to leave an impression.

Stupid Ghost Story!

I really hate ghost story!!!! cos they make me scared for nothing... it's even worse when u r already feeling so tired, worried abt show tml and the day after, and then ur bf suddenly shouted to scare you!

Haiz...